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According to Mike Kiley of the Chicago Sun-Times, there are actually some who would suggest that Sammy Sosa's missing toenail is no big deal. Let me say this to anyone who thinks that: let's take you down to the hospital and remove one of your toenails. When the anesthetic wears off and you stop crying and screaming like a little schoolgirl, we'll take you out to the batting cages and have you swing at a few pitches to get the full effect of what Sosa has been going through with this injury. The pain will give you a new understanding of what it is to be a living being.

Look, I understand it: toes are funny. Nobody takes them seriously. It starts in the cradle with the whole "this little piggy" thing and just escalates from there. Because they are small and seemingly insignificant, nobody wants to take them seriously. The trouble is, they bear the full brunt of our persons when we move around. If we partake in athletic activity, their burden becomes even more pronounced. Kiley talked to Cubs trainer Dave Tumbas after he accompanied Sosa to the hospital to have his bandage changed. Tumbas got a look at the wound and -- medical pro or not -- probably didn't feel much like stopping for lunch on the way home.

''It kind of looks like raw meat,'' he observed. Paul Sullivan of the Chicago Tribune writes that Sosa is now on crutches and that there is no timetable for his return. He will be fitted with an orthopedic boot as well.

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